Not a trader ENG

🐸 $ETH Everyone’s bullposting ETH on the timeline - so let me join in too. How about a clean little $ETH repricing to $2500? Anyone in?

One day you’ll be casually scrolling, thinking the market’s slow and you’ve got time… Then out of nowhere - Bitcoin ignites and launches into a full turbo pump. - A once-in-a-lifetime god candle. Blink and you’ll miss it 😒

Don’t lose hope! Still holding out for a $TON delisting manipulation on Binance 🤣

$ALPACA — let me share a fun little crypto story. There’s no such thing as a free lunch out here. You can sit on a -99% altcoin for years, and then out of nowhere — BOOM — four years of downtrend erased in a day… all thanks to a Binance delisting. In just two days: -80%, then +1500%. This isn’t trading, it’s white-collar clown world. Hilarious levels of crime. Meanwhile, Binance happily rakes in liquidation and trading fees. $2.5B in 24h volume — everyone’s winning… except the poor guy who shorted the -80% move. Crypto is the greatest reality show ever filmed 🍿

$CATI as an example — what do you think? Looks similar, doesn’t it?

🐸 $PX — don’t sleep on this one either. While TON ecosystem tokens are performing well, PX is quietly showing signs of strength too. And let’s not forget — it’s still not listed on a single centralized exchange. The chart looks solid — approaching a trendline breakout. And right on cue, they rolled out staking at 60% APY 👀 Coincidence? Probably not. Feels like a smart move to lock up tokens before any real pump begins — keep the hands from selling. Overall, TON-native projects are some of the few that still look decent on the charts right now. As Dominik Toretto once said: “You just gotta believe in these things” 💪

🐸 $TON Looks like it still wants to push higher. Bonus: yesterday Elon Musk followed Durov’s new Twitter account — gave the price a nice instant boost. On lower timeframes, $TON made a clean S/R Flip, and BTC momentum is still holding up. Unless some major volatility kicks in, the current long scenario towards the $3.8 zone remains in play. Shorts only if we break below the green box (NOT earlier!). So far — everything is going according to plan 🚀

🐸 $ETH What can I say... pretty underwhelming "breakout" (if you can even call it that). Broke out of the trendline — and immediately got smacked back down. Right now it looks more like a typical retest from above than a strong breakout. We'll see how it plays out, but if it doesn't reclaim higher levels soon, it’s going to look pretty sad.

🐸 Oh wow, turns out it’s still alive. $NOT has been pumping non-stop for 9 days, +65% out of nowhere. Last time we saw something like this was 330 days ago. Maybe Pashok is secretly filling the order books while everyone stays silent? Barely seen a single post about this rally — complete radio silence. And honestly… it’s looking pretty damn good 👀

🐸 Nasdaq closes the month green. While everyone was screaming about market crashes, doom, and recession, the tech index quietly pulled itself back up. Sometimes the best trade is simply to survive and not sell on emotions 📈

The best part about trading? Unlike 99% of other professions, other people’s opinions mean absolutely nothing 🐸 You don’t need to make friends, be agreeable, or depend on anyone else’s effort to succeed. No grades from teachers, no approval from a boss — just you and the charts. At the end of the day, it all comes down to one thing: Is your PnL green or red?

🐸 $ETH The consolidation between $1700 and $1550 looks way too familiar… Considering $BTC is still holding the weekly 50EMA — a key bull market support — and $BTC.D hasn’t even printed its final top for this cycle, it feels like everything is going according to plan. I’m personally making my biggest spot buys in this range. Even if it feels scary — this is the zone where you’ve got to stay cold.

No one say a word Keep shtum! 🤫

What would you pick?

🐸 Here’s a chart of the S&P 500 — the index that tracks 500 of the largest publicly traded U.S. companies and serves as the key barometer for the American economy. Nothing to see here, really. Just a $50 trillion index moving like a memecoin 🧃📈 And yet somewhere, someone is still building a macro model based on “fundamentals”...

The money hasn’t vanished — it’s just sitting still, quietly waiting for clarity. Don’t confuse the silence for absence. Most of the capital is in the hands of the top 1%. They’re not panicking. They’re not trying to survive — they’re simply playing the game. Whether they play it well or not doesn’t matter. When the second half begins, they’ll be right back on the field.

74.600$ -> 81.250$ 🚨 TRUMP: AUTHORIZED A 90 DAY PAUSE ON TARIFFS!!!

🐧🦍 Remember when we were buying penguins and apes in the Sticker Store? Well — it finally happened! The long-awaited @market_bot is live, and you can now trade all your favorite sticker packs (and more) directly. Collections like Pudgy Penguins, Doodles, and Bored Stickers are already available — and that's just the beginning. Many more are on the way, so expect some action. 🎉 For the first 7 days — zero fees. After that, the more you trade, the lower the fee. Let’s see how this plays out. We’ve been waiting months for this moment. @market_bot

This is worse than COVID. This is worse than the FTX collapse. The past few weeks have been an absolute bloodbath for the markets. Textbook-style correction: new tariffs from Trump, reshaped trade policy, global realignment — and the market is gasping for air. $9.2 trillion — that’s how much debt needs to be refinanced in 2025. That’s not just a number — that’s a ticking nuclear bomb. As for $SPX: -20–25% drawdowns happen about once every two years. COVID was the exception with -35%, but this time it *feels* like we’re nearing the end. I believe we saw the bottom earlier this week. I’m expecting April to be strong — for crypto as well. 📆 Tomorrow is the tariff deadline, and U.S. tax season ends on the 15th. So we’ll likely get shaken around for a few more days… but after that — time to breathe and lock in April for the bounce 🐸