Human Nature

Anxious Attachment An anxious attachment style may present itself as the need for frequent reassurance that you are loved and that the other person is not about to abandon you. Those with an anxious attachment style may have grown up in an environment in which they did not feel safe that their caregivers would return, or one where they did not have access to consistent affection or responsiveness and availability was inconsistent. Anxious attachments can show up in people-pleasing behaviours; struggles in expressing personal needs or avoidance of confrontation and conflict, a focus on meeting the needs of the partner to the detriment of one’s own personal needs. The constant focus on preventing abandonment can become a self-fullfilling prophecy, as the relentless need for reassurance can feel controlling to those who may have an avoidant attachment style, and may lead to conflict. The anxiously attached partner may build up resentment towards a partner who does not consistently provide that reassurance but may also feel unable to fully express their needs for fear of conflict. The answer in these situations is neither a constant flow of reassurance, nor dismissing the needs and hoping they go away. Instead, the anxiously attached partner can practise creating a sense of safeness independently from their partner by building their sense of self and learning to soothe themselves. The partner can help this by providing more consistent connection without waiting for the other person to ask for it. So these are things we can work on both individually and as a couple. #HumanNature ♡ ㅤ   ⎙ㅤ  ⌲ 🔕💪 ˡᶦᵏᵉ ˢᵃᵛᵉ ˢʰᵃʳᵉ ᵏⁱⁿᵈˡʸ ᵘⁿᵐᵘᵗᵉ ᶜʰᵃⁿⁿᵉˡ Join now👇👇👇 @Laws_of_Human_Nature

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The Problem with "I Just Want to be Happy" It’s not uncommon to hear ‘I just want to be happy.’ But the idea of happiness has been hijacked over the years by an elusive fairytale of constant pleasure and satisfaction with life. You don’t have to look far on social media to come across a wave of posts telling you to ‘be positive, stay happy, eliminate negativity from your life’. We are given the impression that happiness is the norm and anything outside of that could be a mental health problem. We are also sold the idea that if we can achieve material wealth, happiness will arrive and stick around. But humans are not built to be in a constant happy state. We are built to respond to the challenges of survival. Emotions are a reflection of our physical state, our actions, beliefs and what is going on around us. All of those things are constantly changing. Therefore, a normal state is one that constantly changes too. Emotions are like the weather. They are constantly moving and changing, sometimes predictably, sometimes suddenly and unexpectedly. Emotions are always a part of our experience. But, just like the weather, some moments are pleasant and others are hard to endure. At other times, there is nothing distinct enough for us to easily describe. When we recognize the nature of human experience in this way, it becomes clear that anything being sold to us with the promise of happily ever after cannot live up to its promise if happy means the absence of any of the less pleasant emotions. We can live a happy and fulfilling life and still experience the full range of emotions that comes along with being human. Buying into the idea that happiness means constant positivity can leave us believing we have failed when we feel down. We feel like we are getting something wrong, or we feel afraid that we may have a mental health problem. Thinking in that way then makes that dark cloudy day even darker. Sometimes we are not happy because we are human and life is difficult a lot of the time.Things that bring us the most happiness in our lives bring much more than happy feelings. The best example is the people in our lives. Your family, who mean the world to you, may upset you the most when they get things wrong. Parents feel a profound sense of meaning in their roles and intense feelings of love and joy. But they also feel great pain and fear and shame at times too. So happy moments are just one flower in a very large bouquet. You can’t have one without the other. Emotions come as a whole bunch. #HumanNature ♡ ㅤ   ⎙ㅤ  ⌲ 🔕💪 ˡᶦᵏᵉ ˢᵃᵛᵉ ˢʰᵃʳᵉ ᵏⁱⁿᵈˡʸ ᵘⁿᵐᵘᵗᵉ ᶜʰᵃⁿⁿᵉˡ Join now👇👇👇 @Laws_of_Human_Nature

Our personal sense of reality is created through our perception; through the ways in which we view our experiences, not the events themselves. However, it is easy to forget this, or even fail to recognize it. We tend to mistake our viewpoint of the world for the absolute, objective truth, rather than acknowledging the role of perception and its influence in creating our perspective, together with all the ideas, actions, and beliefs that stem from it. #AnachronismQuotes ♡ ㅤ   ⎙ㅤ  ⌲ 🔕💪 ˡᶦᵏᵉ ˢᵃᵛᵉ ˢʰᵃʳᵉ ᵏⁱⁿᵈˡʸ ᵘⁿᵐᵘᵗᵉ ᶜʰᵃⁿⁿᵉˡ Join now👇👇👇 @Laws_of_Human_Nature